Family dinners are rare these days.

Tonight was just like one of those nights where the whole family meets up after not seeing each other for some time. Dad was in Taiwan, I was in Berkeley, okay I guess my sister and mother still had to deal with each other back at home.

Tonight we also knew that we won’t be seeing each other for some time. Grandpa, who I’ve only seen twice when I was little, passed away, and my parents are going back to Taiwan tomorrow for the week-long funeral. My parents didn’t want me and my sister to go, saying we’d be missing school.

I always wondered which I was going to attend first: a wedding, or a funeral. For a moment I thought it was going to be funeral.

Anyways I guess family tragedies have a way of bringing us closer together. Tonight I think we almost appreciated our time together. I watched Nickelodeon with my dad. My sister and I planned what shenanigans we’re going to do together next weekend. And Mom went around frantically trying to be that teacher to me, all these ways of cooking, cleaning, fixing my broken doors and frames. Nudging me to develop skills fast, since I’m growing up faster than we all can comprehend.

I know so often I let my mom down, and when I do she sometimes acts in ways that seem completely counter to the idea that she wants what’s best for me. But tonight got me thinking, with the way I was showing her around our just-cleaned apartment, that maybe she is starting to trust that I can live on my own. Maybe she won’t, as she calls it, “go crazy” anymore in the future. Maybe I can prove to her that she really is my greatest teacher. That she has not failed as a mom.

1 month ago on June 19, 2014 at 02:13am via SoundCloud / R O J O

Smell the allergies.

Where are you going, mr duck?

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leica iii cross section, 1934

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